I can't put my daughter in daycare.
Not won't.
Simply can't.
My head, my heart, my entire being rejects the idea. 
Being away from Elsie for more than a couple hours actually causes me pain.
Physical pain.
I become so anxious that my stomach churns, my head hurts, and my chest aches. I know women all over the world drop their babies off every day on their way to work, but I can't. I guess I'm not as strong as them. or something.
That is why I'm determined to contribute to our family's finances without leaving my daughter for hours on a daily basis.
Right now, I've got a list of over 100 things that I intend to do to ensure this endeavor is a success.
I'm only on step 7.
Yikes, I've got a long way to go, and a lot of work ahead of me.
But it's worth it, if it means I never have to let that little lady out of my sight.
5 comments:
Just please please please please don't homeschool her.
Just curious... why are you against homeschool?
I agree with you, but think that referring to it as abandoning her is harsh. Especially when viewed by someone who had/has no choice. Ivan and I still disagree on this. It doesn't get any easier and won't for school. It's been 2 years for me and I still dread when I have to take Alexander to daycare. I always feel queasy afterwards, but don't really talk about it.
Regarding homeschooling - if public schools continue to spiral down and ignore the actual needs of teachers and children we'll be looking for private school or homeschooling. There are some people who are quacks about homeschooling and should never attempt it with their children, but I've most that I've known have become quite successful and are very intelligent.
Wow. Reply longer than intended.
Hey Skye- I agree with you on all counts here, and I edited the post with less harsh wording. I should've said it *felt like* abandoning her. Hahaha but I think I'm a little over dramatic on the subject cause that's how it feels even when I'm leaving her with her Grandma!One reason I wrote this post is because (as one of them now, kind of) it always feels like Stay-at-home-moms get a bad wrap- that they're too lazy to get jobs, or that we jut watch tv all day and sit on our bums, when in reality I work myself silly... even though it's frequently from the comfort of my studio and/or living room. And as for home school- I'm of the mind that it greatly depends on how the kid is- some kids I know absolutely need public school setting, whereas some absolutely thrive in a less distracting enviroment. Both Dr A and I feel that a program like K-12 would have benefited us a lot growing up. At least for the two of us (in Hall County) public school was not a good environment for learning.
Stay at home moms do get a bad wrap, but for some it is true...but they are usually horrible moms. I honestly don't think it compares to a working mom simply for the fact that a working mom has to do everything a stay at home mom does plus work and, hardest of all, be away from her child. It's hard for some dads, too. I think you're finding a great middle ground where you starting your own business, but have the benefit of being at home with your kid, too. Yay for you!
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